A Cellist in the Tuba Section

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Have you ever gone to an event, like a party or a dinner or a school dance, and you find yourself totally ignored. Maybe you stand awkwardly against a wall and no one sees you. Maybe someone cuts you off in line and you feel totally invisible. Trust me, I've had more than my fair share of these moments, when it feels like I'm wearing an outfit more fit for a ninja than whatever function I'm at. Recently I was at a graduation party for a friend of mine and I showed up, was greeted, and then promptly assumed my place in oblivion. I don't blame the host, because it was her party and everyone was demanding her attention and she really did try. I went with no intention or expectation of having a long, heartfelt chat with her. (Graduation parties are exhausting for the person they're honoring.) However, I did go in with the expectation that the other students there, both the ones who were in the now graduating class and the ones I had graduated with, would at least try ...

Dear Giselle, My mom hates this band that I love. I don't know how to explain to her that it's something really important to me. Do you have any advice for dealing with a parent that doesn't support your interests? Thanks, Mom's Bad Band Dear Mom's Bad Band, Thank you so much for writing to me. I want to start by saying that you are certainly not alone in this situation. A lot of teenagers find themselves facing off with their parents about their interests, activities, friends, etc. It's important to keep in mind that your parents have your best interests at heart almost 99% of the time. (Yes, we're all human, and sometimes even parents can make selfish decisions regarding the activities or interests of their kids). So, the first thing I would suggest is looking at some of the songs with your mother and discussing why she doesn't like the band. Maybe it's the language the band uses, in which case you may be able to play certain songs that do...

Dear Giselle, How do I continue learning over the summer? Thanks, No Brain Mush Dear No Brain Mush, There are several free web sites that can be used to learn new material over the summer. The two that really come to my mind are Khan Academy and Lyrics Training: Khan Academy has a variety of topics from math to practical life skills. Lyrics Training teaches you languages through cultural music videos. Another option is to read some of the classics. This is my favorite summer activity. Some books to check out would be: Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice Mary Shelley's Frankenstein Agatha Christie books--mysteries are fun to make you think Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness Oscar Wilde's The Picture of Dorian Gray Fyodor Dostoyevsky's Crime and Punishment You can also check out your local library for activities or suggestions for reading. Your loving sister and fellow cellist in the tuba section, Giselle To submit your own question, email it to acell...

Dear Giselle, I'm wondering what the big deal is about sending nudes? I mean, it's not having sex. They're just pictures. Sincerely, What's the Big Deal? Dear What's the Big Deal? Sending nudes is not a great idea for two reasons. First, it you're under the age of 18, it may qualify as child pornography under your states' laws, and possession of child pornography (yes, even your own nudes) could be considered a sexual offense. That's not something to take lightly. There was a student at my high school whose nudes got leaked and he was charged as a sexual offender. (He was a minor so everything's sealed, but still this is best to avoid). Secondly, your body houses the Holy Spirit, which makes it a temple. I know, I know, it's an overused line for everything remotely sexual, but it's a very real verse in scripture. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have f...

Dear Giselle, I really like this guy and he drinks a lot. I don't want to drink, but I don't know how else to get his attention. Do you have any suggestions for getting his attention. Sincerely, Drinking Date Dear Drinking Date, This sounds like a complicated situation, but I'll do my best to help. First, if either of you are under the age of twenty-one, remember that it's illegal to drink in the United States. If you're over twenty-one, or the legal age in your country, my advice would be to find a guy that doesn't need alcohol to have fun. You certainly shouldn't need it to impress him. Here's why: alcohol distorts reality. If you have to use alcohol to get a guy's attention, he's not paying attention to the real version of you. He's paying attention to a version of you that's a fantasy, like a dream. While we often have compelling romantic dreams, we usually don't act on those dreams in real life. If you're really sti...